3 Things NOT to Do if You Want to Get Your Ex Boyfriend (or Ex Girlfriend) Back

If you have just been through a break up, you very well may be asking yourself "how can I get my ex boyfriend back" (or "how can I get my ex girlfriend back".) There is good news - there are actually things that you can do. This article, however, deals with some of the things you should NEVER do! While these may seem like common sense, it never hurts to remind oneself of them, since common sense is not necessarily common practice.

1. Do Not Stalk! You most likely are feeling that you need to talk with your ex immediately. These feelings are normal, but you really should pause and give yourself, and your ex, a little time. Stalking will simply turn them off. Be aware that stalking can take many forms. Repeatedly calling your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend, leaving constant messages, texting until your fingers hurt, showing up at places you expect them to be - these are all forms of stalking. Let's be honest - at best, stalkers are annoying, at worst, they can be downright scary.

2. Do Not Hassle your ex's friends and families. I have to give a personal spin on this one. A friend, call him Jack, had recently broken up with his girlfriend, let's call her Jill. I worked in the same building with Jill, and was on friendly terms with her, though we were not necessarily close friends. For months after the break up, every time I would see Jill in the hallways (which was frequently) she would stop me and ask, whiningly, "Why do you think he broke up with? Why? Has he said anything to you? Why? Why...why...wah...wah..." That is what it began to sound like, and she became the butt of quite a few jokes because she did this with everyone. Of course, the answer that came to mind as she repeatedly asked why was "probably because you are so needy!" I refrained form saying this out loud, but it does lead us to the next point.

3. Don't Act So Needy! Yes, this can be difficult if you are hurting. You may truly feel that you cannot survive without your ex. But, guess what. You can. And you stand a much better chance of getting them back if you show that you really can be independent. Certainly, most people, including your ex, like to feel needed and wanted, but that is not the same as feeling smothered. Give them some space, and give yourself some space as well. You need time to think and sort through your feelings, even though you may feel like that is the last thing you want right now. Time has a way of clarifying things. By giving yourself and your ex time to think and space to breath, any reconciliation efforts that may follow can take place in an atmosphere of less stress, which can only be good for all concerned.

There are many things you can do to get your ex back - these are topics for future articles. But there are also things that you should never do. Three of these are shown above. So remember, if you are asking yourself "how can I get my ex boyfriend back" (or girlfriend,) give some thought to the things you should NOT do while trying to discover what you can do.

Now that you know what not to do, find out what you should do. There really are things that work, even some that are guaranteed! To find out more about what you can do to get your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend back, and for videos and other resources, click this link.